Sunday, April 01, 2007


THE CRUSADER DECK

A few smart asses from Iranian intelligence (VEVAK) have just published a pack of 'Personality Identification Playing Cards', apparently using the Saudi flag as a watermark in order to obscure their origin.

So much for that brilliant plan.

Anyway, the cards ostensibly depict key U.S. figures most wanted by the Pan Moslem Coalition of Combined Forces.

–The deck is obviously someone's idea of a joke but one diplomat I know and with whom I am exchanging electronic correspondence insists they are indeed "people of interest".

But President Bush? Really?

Of course, Murdoch (6/Spades) and Wolfowitz (K/Diamonds) were forcibly taken into custody last December while attending a Media and Public Policy Conference in Melbourne, and that's no laughing matter.

Roy Disney (10/Hearts) and Jeb Bush (8/Clubs) were also scooped up as well, in January, just after PMC Special Forces rolled into Florida and burned a hole through Disney World.

You can bet that right now all four of those guys are playing checkers in an undisclosed maximum security prison in the Indian Ocean, –probably on the island of Nusa Kambangan, which has been called the 'Alcatraz of Indonesia' and makes Guantanamo Bay look like a five star resort.

Still, the word in the field is any grunt who nabs one of the remaining individuals gets a tidy bonus payable in gold dinars.

In addition to being something of a hit list, The Crusader Deck is also a hit on the black market. My contacts in Doha say every Mid East hipster from Tehran to Tangiers has a copy.

Anyway, I've uploaded the complete deck to a secure Al Jazeera server and will try to post as many here as I can. Click the label at the bottom of this post that reads 'The Crusader Deck' to see the whole deck. Click on any set of four cards to open a new tab or window to view those cards at print size.

The world is changing. Let's not get left behind.

Siraj