Wednesday, July 26, 2006


Your last post was a trip.

But North Dakota, dude? The Promise Land? Are you kidding me? I don't think so. You can keep it. As a matter of fact, and no offense to the beautiful people of North Dakota, but I would prefer New Jersey over North Dakota.

But either way, my promise land is right here– New York City.

Yeah, I would fight for Israel's right to exist. And I'm proud to be a citizen of the good old U.S of A. I would never change that.

My country and my religion right or wrong. What makes that especially cool is that, in my case, neither has actually ever been wrong. You can't say that about any other nation or faith, really. But whatever. Even in relation to Tibetan Buddhism. Am I the only one tired of the Dalai Lama whining over Chinese occupation of Tibet? The Tibetan Buddhists themselves were an occupying force, but we'll save that for another rant.

Seriously, tho, give New York nation status, and then things get tricky. The Big Apple has a lot of things going for it. If it were it's own country I would really consider defecting just so I could say I live in Brooklyn.

So, you want me to choose between North Dakota, or the city that never sleeps? Lemme tell ya: A lot you can do if you can stay awake all the time.

Better cheesecake in Brooklyn than in North Dakota (I'm sure).
Better bagels in Manhattan than New Jersey, I might add (not just my opinion).
I think it's the water.
Either that or the mob higher standards than even orthodox rabbis.

And if I ever get the impulse to travel overseas for any other reason than to catch a wave and enjoy the surf, I'll go to Queens, thank you very much.

At least you don't need a passport to visit Astoria.

Hey, I know it sounds myopic, but maybe you all should just call me if the Chinese invade the Persian Gulf and start to lay claim to what's left of our Saudi oil reserves.

That's when you know we're all really deep in it–

Thankfully, the world can't get any more fucked up than it is.

now, damn, people, i'm late, my day is just beginning, so i gotta run to work. Apparently someone in Wolfsburg thinks a fresh tag line from a New York ad agency will help them sell more German cars. My first and only suggestion so far was:


but the client wants cute, and my boss thinks it sounds like a catch phrase from a sitcom.

They say there's a science to advertising, but a it's still all just voo doo marketing to me. I'm sure I can come up with something. I mean, you know, I have actually done this before.

Ironic that the client selected a New York agency, because everyone I know takes the subway to work. I haven't driven a vehicle since I moved here, and that was almost twelve years ago. in fact:

metrocard, muffin and triple espresso: who needs fuel –that is fuel!

and yeah, of course, Annika, The Ramones rock!

The Jasp